Monday, September 17, 2012

The Magic of Time (more specifically: Two Years)

Two years. How have two YEARS gone by so fast?

Something magical must happen to time when the prospect of a new baby looms...
It all starts with the pregnancy test. That's when the "magic" begins.
You pee on THE stick and waiting for a second line to appear takes 3 hours instead of 3 minutes as you pace in the bathroom wondering, hoping, panicking.
9 months feel like 9 years as you take place in a nauseous, gassy, heartburny, uncomfortable, but totally worth it miracle. 9 years waiting for the "glow".
Labor lasts for 389 hours, whether you're a first time mom or a fifth time mom. THREE HUNDRED AND EIGHTY NINE HOURS.
The first sleepless night is actually 6 nights all wrapped up into one.
The first time he gets sick, it lasts for 26 days and the wait at the pediatrician's office takes 5 days and the line at CVS takes 12 hours.
The first time he rolls over... it literally takes him 2 hours as he slowwwwly pushes himself over onto his back only to start crying because it turns out he actually likes laying on his stomach better. Unfortunately it takes 2 hours and 5 minutes to find the video camera and you miss it. The first roll.

Somewhere in there the "magic" takes an unexpected twist.
Somewhere in there TWO YEARS has magically been squished and packaged up into a tiny, little box labeled "memories".
It's really not fair at all.

In lieu of this awful bit of "magic" that moms must endure, I have some specific memories that I want to delicately place in that little box. Things I don't want to forget, whether 10 days or 10 years pass by. When I get old, and who really knows how long that will take and when it will be, I want to reach into that box and remember some little things about life right now. About Eli being.... deep breath... Two.

Eli, my love, this is you on your first full day of being two:

That's right... you've got your first fat lip. The day after your birthday party you were playing around on the bed after church. I was pretending to be a lion, you were squealing, you turned around to get away from me and SMACK right into the headboard. There was a lot of blood. A lot. Like two gallons. What I want to remember is how you only wanted your mommy. You wanted to cry into my shoulder and you didn't want anyone else to touch you. I rocked you right to sleep and I was the one you called for when you woke up.

Rewind to your birthday party (which although I planned to last 3 hours, it only lasted 3 minutes), we had a "Two at the Zoo" party because you love animals THAT much.

You were in heaven. Not a day goes by that we don't talk about animals or pretend to be animals (usually gators or lions) or watch some animals on TV or play with your animal figures or practice our animal sounds (low/loud "daddy" animal noises and high-pitched/quiet "baby" animal noises). You are all about animals.

What else do you love? Let's see.... rocks, bugs, sticks, dirt, swimming, and water. You don't love posing for pictures though... and we are still working on your "cheese" face (see below):

I don't mind too much though because the candid, real smiles are my favorites and luckily we get lots of those every day (see below):

You also love to color. Lately it has become a daily activity. It's so funny to watch your two year old self with pencil in hand because you concentrate so hard and try to be so precise, which results in your tongue slowing poking it's way out between your lips.

Your drawings are tiny precisely drawn scribbles and you tell me what each one is whether it be a "scary" snake, a "yucky" bug, a "daddy" boat, or some other item that you describe in detail.

Lately you've been all about coloring "Kaysi". Oh and it never fails that you want me to color with you, always offering me a pencil and usually proclaiming that it is "green" even when I correct you and say it's yellow.... "Nope... it's GREEN!" I love that I can drop my chores and sit by your side to draw those spiders and stars and cows.

Some of my favorite moments with you at this age are the ones right before you fall asleep. You have so many precious quirks in that time between growing exhaustion and your dreamland.

I love the way you rub your hair when you begin to get tired. The way that you insist you don't want to take a nap as you relax into my arms. The way you try to bargain for extra kisses just to stay awake longer, reaching for the sides of my face and pulling me to you. The way you reach for the mole on my cheek when your eyes begin to glaze over. The way you sleepily mutter, "I love you, mom" without me even prompting you. Even the drool I find on my shoulder after I tuck you into your bed. I wish those moments could last years and years.

I could go on and on about the things I want to remember.
How you love to dance and make up your own songs ("Mom, I'm singing!")
How you pretend to have "boo-boos" just so I will kiss them and you can say, "It's all better mom!"
How you very adamantly yell "NO SNIR!" to me when you want me to stop doing something
How you've made up your own word that embarrasses me because you use it so often (hoppeeze, which started out as "help please!")
How every time you hear a motorcycle you ask if it's Grandpas (more accurately, "Papaw")
How lately the first thing I hear over the baby monitor in the morning is "Mommy! Wanna watch Diego??"

There are too many memories I want to keep close to my heart. And after just two years.
I just can't imagine how I am going to fit SO many more into that tiny little box over the years... or should I say weeks? Days? Hours? Minutes?

I love you my sweet, little boy and I can't wait (though I probably won't have to wait long) for the memories to come.

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